In the final story titled "Bound," it becomes apparent that while Ronald, Bridget's husband, is the only one who originally approves of her leaving to Vietnam, eventually, they all disapprove. Bridget doesn't care about their opinions about her leaving, though she tries to pretend she does."But I care what you think. Is this okay?" (191). She continually asks her husband if he is okay with her extending her stay in Vietnam but even when he starts to say he isn't okay with it, she still stays. Because she is a mother and a wife, she understands their uneasiness about her leaving her family behind. However, because she cares so deeply about the children in this war country, she puts herself and her family aside. Throughout the years Ronald files for legal separation from Bridget, yet she remains in denial about their relationship. "She'd make them see. They could love each other. They'd be happy. They would appreciate for the rest of their lives the sacrifices that Bridget had made for them, realize she'd been right all along" (209). Bridget assumes that she can make everything go back to the way it was before she left because in her mind, she thinks her family can understand why she had to go to Vietnam.
However, their opinions of her leaving have not improved and in fact they have worsened. She fails to realize that her family could never understand her reasoning for staying so long. They didn't see the struggles she faced in Vietnam with having to see babies die or having to turn away sick children. They also didn't see how much she was able to help save children in the orphanage and how much of a difference she made as the only doctor in the orphanage.Ronald's separation from her proves just how distant their relationship has become not only physically but also emotionally. They were already physically separated with her being in Vietnam, but his choice to file for legal separation and send the papers to her shows how serious he is about their relationship being over. And her decision to not leave after receiving those papers, shows how serious she is about her work in the orphanage and how little she thinks of her relationship with Ronald. Not only is she in denial about her relationships in America, but she is also in denial about her relationship with Huan. She knows there is little chance of her being able to keep Huan, yet she continues to hold onto him believing she will. Even if she could keep Huan, her family dynamic would drastically change and there is no assurance that they would be accepting of him.
By Ariel R.
I agree with you about how Bridget is neglectful of her relationship, but I don't think that she thinks little of her relationship. I believe she was neglectful in an ignorant way as she saw only one thing her work. I feel that this due to her personality as a workaholic and that's who she has always been . This is a characteristic that I think cannot be changed just like you couldn't change someone who is lazy. It is a part of who they are and I don't think it is fair to put Bridget down as she did amazing work. I think Bridget as a doctor and as a mother she found it hard to leave the orphanage because she knew that their was no one else to take care of them she knew her daughter had her father and herself, as she never intended to stay in Vietnam forever.
ReplyDeleteBy Marisa M.
I love the connection you made between Bridget's relationship and Huan. I never saw the perspective of Huan as a metaphor, but I think it's ultimately true. She knew in the back of her mind that wanting to adopt another child was a bit wrong, but still saw Huan as her own, the same way that she still saw Ronald as her husband after he filed for a legal separation. I think you highlighted Bridget's oblivion really well, while also highlighting her reasoning behind it. She was faced with a lot of heart-wrenching work, and she was an immense help at the orphanage as well--something her family in the States would simply never understand because they didn't see it for themselves.
ReplyDeleteBy Katrina F.
I agree that it is a unique connection between Bridget's awareness of the reality of being able to adopt Huan. I hadn't noticed that connection as a reference for her relationship with her family back home either. It's a really good point to make that her husband and parents would never be able to understand the sacrifice she is making and why, because they don't have the perspective that she has of the true devastation of the war. As a doctor she has the instinct to protect/help those in need of it before those who don't, so she is constantly drawn to the obvious need for her help in Vietnam. Rationalizing this by knowing that at least her family is safe and protected at home, but not understanding that the emotional strain it was causing was just as damaging.
ReplyDeleteBy Julia G.
Rather than seeing Bridget as neglecting wife and mother, I sympathized with her desire to help those who could not help themselves: the sick, innocent babies who were byproducts of foreign involvement. I personally thought this short story proposed an interesting perspective on the balance of personal desire vs. moral duty -- in Bridget's case, these cannot co-exist. Her humanitarian work in Vietnam was life changing in that she was able to give many of these babies a chance at life (in spite of the trials they have yet to face in being unwanted). She sacrificed her personal relationships over the course of three years, perhaps unknowingly, as she dedicated herself to these orphans. This is also perhaps why she returns to the U.S. in denial of what she has lost. Her husband and daughter gradually found themselves emotionally detached as Bridget lacked in presence in their lives. She experienced Vietnam’s need for help firsthand while her family lacked in understanding by distancing themselves.
ReplyDeleteBy Kristinah K.